2008 Shelby GT500

With exception to the 94-98 body, I've always liked mustangs. Even though most of them have been terrible cars, they always had a charm about them that made you forgive some the flaws of the mustang. This was fortunate for Ford Motor Company because the cars, for the most part, were bafflingly bad. Since it was based on a rental car they handled horribly, didn't look particularly good, were bad on gas, very slow, and had an interior that would have been higher quality if it was built from grass and dried mud. Start typing in Google "Mustang" and you'll see more about mustang fails and crashes than anything. From an outside perspective it's nearly impossible to understand how the mustang didn't go extinct, much less how it's still to this day one of the most popular cars in America.

When the Coyote 5.0 made its debut in the 2011 Mustang, everything changed. No, the car wasn't as nimble as an MX5, but for the first time ever there was a good boulevard cruiser that didn't feel insanely out of place at the first sight of a corner. I was all set to name the 2011 Mustang 5.0 "The Best Mustang ever built." That all changed when I got my hands on a 2008 GT500 though...
The 2008 GT500 isn't insanely fast by any means, but its supercharged 32 valve 5.4 liter V8 makes quite a lot of power, and more than substantial torque off idle. This V8 is based off the 5.4L Triton V8 found in many Ford trucks, which explains the torque off idle. What it doesn't explain is how happy the engine is to rev. The GT500 throttle response is worlds better than the Coyote 5.0, it revs faster, feels more natural, and it pulls like a freight train. This is a heavy car, but any gear, any RPM, you can put your foot down and just go. Remember how I said Mustangs had a charm about them that made you forgive their flaws? This car packs a supercharged gut punch of charm that makes you completely forget the cheap interior and bad handling characteristics. If this engine was wrapped in a respectable chassis, it would be one of the best cars in the world. It pains me to think that, because once upon a time you could have that basic engine in the heroic Ford GT, but the newly released GT turned its back on the passionate supercharged V8 in lieu of an Ecoboost V6 that's as un-supercar like as can be.
Back to the Mustang though, because it does have some flaws. While it isn't ugly, its very bland and generic to look at. The exhaust is also so quiet that its impossible to hear over the sound of the blower. Ford produces one of the best exhaust notes out there, let us hear it instead of muffling it to make it quieter than a stock Mustang GT.
Though the new Mustang 5.0 is a more well balanced car overall, the GT500 is a far better at being a true mustang. Hop  in the GT500 and the car practically begs you to drag race away from every stoplight, the 5.0 is just too refined, too polite, and after feeling the intoxicating character of the 5.4L, the 5.0 is just too boring. A mustang should be big, loud, in your face, and it should shrug off its better handling competitors because it just doesn't care. Your mother always told you to be yourself, and with that in mind Ford: let the Mustang be a Mustang, don't force it into European clothing and take away its American characteristics. You have the Focus ST to be European, give us back our classic American Mustang. My advice to anyone who want's a brand new Mustang, but want's the classic Mustang charm: buy a Dodge Challenger, because right now the Mustang is having an identity crisis.

2015 Golf GTI: Superior to the 2012 Golf R

Right, so you've probably noticed that there is a pretty significant gap in years between these two vehicles, in fact an entire generation gap. 2015 represents a lighter, stiffer, more powerful Volkswagen GTI, and a lot of that shows in the driving dynamics. Since the debut of the Focus ST I've said that Ford had knocked the GTI off the throne as the best hot hatch, and this redesign seems to be an attempt by the Germans to take back the crown.
Now lets roll back to the 2012 Golf R; I drove one around for a while and hated everything about how it felt. It was fat, laggy, sluggish, and Volkswagen seemed to have found a way to make all wheel drive handle far worse than front wheel drive. Its as if lugging around the R's heavy AWD drive-train makes the car feel very unenthusiastic about driving fast.  Shift quickly and you're punished by sensation that almost feels like the car is bogging down. Launch the car hard enough to get any sort of tire spin and you get the feeling your clutch will only last you 1/4 mile. If you gave me one of those cars to drive, I would walk to work instead. Not because the car is the worst thing I've ever been in, and the interior is absolutely fantastic, but because Volkswagen took a bunch of wonderful ingredients, built a recipe for the Golf R, and still managed to produce a disaster from the mix.  Its too boring, too dull, it feels like they took inspiration from the Toyota Camry when they designed this car.
A hot hatch shouldn't be like something you would order on a night out at an expensive steakhouse, that's too grown up and sophisticated. A hot hatch, rather, should be a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. You shouldn't feel like you have to put on a suit and tie when you hop in your hatch; imagine getting all dressed up to make a PB&J, it would be ridiculous. The Golf R is incapable of having fun, the tires won't spin, quick shifts seem to baffle and confuse the car, and I swear I can turn in harder in the front wheel drive GTI. If you own a Golf R and hadn't realized how miserable it is until now don't be alarmed because you do have options. First off (and my personal recommendation) you can sell your car and buy something else. Seriously, your useless AWD car has a base price of almost $40,000 so you can easily trade it in on something better and still come out with money in hand. Secondly, you can modify it to make it less boring. It really doesn't matter what you do, any modification will be an improvement. If you were to hacksaw the roof off, and remove the tires entirely the car would be better. I could talk for days about all the things I didn't like about the R, but that much negativity is bad for the soul, so lets get on to the 2015 GTI.
For 2015 the new 2.0 turbo engine pumps out ten more ponies than the last Golf, but more importantly there's a massive jump in torque. Imagine taking an already decent PB&J and adding 25% more peanut butter. The result: simply brilliant. I don't feel the need to wear a suit when I drive this car, I hardly feel the need to wear pants when I drive it! Volkswagen has finally regained some of that childish fun that made the original GTI's such a hit. Launch the car hard and you get some good old fashioned tire spin. Shifting into second yields a delightful bark of the tires unlike the R. There's still a noticeable amount of turbo lag, but the wave of torque paired with the much improved sound makes it all okay. I didn't get the chance to really push the GTI, but I did find myself driving it much quicker than an ordinary car, and enjoying myself in a Volkswagen for the first time in a long time.
Volkswagen may have only pumped in 51 more foot pounds of torque to the equation, but that gave the car the attitude its ancestors would finally be proud of. While I still prefer the Focus to the GTI, Volkswagen has done something truly special with this new car. Although you don't feel the need to wear a suit and tie every time you drive, the Golf is classy enough that you could if you wanted to. Can you imagine pulling up in a "Tangerine Scream" orange Ford Focus ST and getting out wearing a suit and tie? Of course not, it would be more ridiculous than when Kia had the Hamsters hop out of the Soul all dressed up. The GTI isn't as thrilling as the Focus, but its light years better than its big brother, the Golf R, or as it should be called: the Golf Zzzzzzz....

2009 BMW Z4 3.5 sDrive

You won't see me excited about too many cars that lack a third pedal, so honestly I tend to avoid them for the most part. With more and more performance cars leaning that way I was still pessimistic during my initial walk around of this stunning blue subject. The z4 in general looks great, but with the hardtop convertible it really blares the definition of roadster. To me it does so too much, to the point where I began to wonder; was this car made to be driven, or made to be seen being driven.

Hop inside and you're greeted with a very nice subtle interior wrapped in high quality materials. This is to be expected of any car at this price level, but there's one major blemish: the cup holder situation. The car has 3 cup holders, one of them fixed to the center console sticking out like a sore thumb into the passenger space. For the life of me I can't get past this cup holder. If it retracted back into the center console it would be fine, but its just sitting there, permanently fixed in the up position like Eminem's middle finger. The other two are hidden under the center arm rest which is annoying because it means no armrest if you want a beverage.

No worries though, this car has a twin turbo straight six under that massive hood, so one thing is for sure: its going to be fast. Quite fast, in fact. On the road the car feels really good. The DCT transmission is surprisingly smooth, and lightning fast. Personally I still prefer the good old slow three pedal system,

Pull up next to just about any mustang at the light and have no fear: everyone will see you run away from them with ease. The car is definitely a rocket off the line, and you never lose boost with the lightning fast shifts from the transmission. The first area of fault I really had with the BMW was the handling. That exaggerated roadster styling has definitely taken its toll on the way the car goes around corners. If you dive into a turn too quickly you will find pretty serious understeer, and then when the back of the car realizes whats going on the car sways, bucks, and kicks out the back like a muscle car.

Overall the car genuinely feels like a nice, luxurious, muscle car meant to be seen in rather than actually driven hard. Its definitely good to drive, but it lacks the sharpness and controllable feel of an mx-5. Up in Motor City is where this car belongs, putting classic muscle cars to shame from stoplight to stoplight.

Fiat 500 Abarth

86 cubic inches. That's it, just 86 tiny little cubic inches make up the angry little Fiat's engine. Go to a local gas station and you'll likely find a super big gulp cup with more volume than this car displaces. What you won't likely find at the gas station is very many Fiat 500's.  When kept out of boost these cars are great on gas, which is good because it has a microscopic gas tank. In my case, however, the little Italian spent quite a lot of time in boost howling through its unmuffled vocal chords like a roaring tiger. That isn't even an exaggeration, go listen to a video of a tiger growling, the sound is eerily similar.

Sitting in the Abarth you feel much higher off the ground than you would expect from a relatively small car. The car doesn't provide the same sensation of your typical hot hatch, more like a small SUV that someone shrunk down ever dimension except height. The car is just as quirky as its competitor the, the Mini Cooper S, but not quite as charming. The buttons on the dash are big and cheap looking, and with the strange hard plastic dash pad the car literally looks like one of those Jitterbug cell phones people used to buy for their grandparents. I found the only button I was concerned with relatively quickly though, the sport button. Fiat claims that engaging sport mode will boost torque to 170 foot pounds, which if I'm honest isn't a lot. It isn't like anyone ever got in a car like this and thought "Yikes, its a bit damp out, I better limit the torques to 150 to avoid loosing control in my front wheel drive car!" There is a distinct sensation that the car was originally designed to constantly be in sport mode. It's almost as if Fiat designers intended only one driving mode, then management threw a fit and required a more economically friendly driving mode to boost MPG's. Pop the microscopic hood to look at the microscopic engine and you'll wonder if Fiat started with an engine and built the car around it, because there is no wasted space at all.

Hopping on the interstate was an absolute blast, the car loves boost, and even though there is quite a lot of throw in the shifter, the operation of it feels great. First, second, and third are up in no time, and that muscular howl puts many factory v8's to shame. At speed the car feels very neutral, but still a little bit top heavy during quick lane changes to pass. Plenty of torque is available in any gear, a rare gift in the turbo 4 world. Honestly this car was shaping up to be a real slam dunk, but then it happened: A slightly off camber sharp turn. After driving countless hot hatches and quick front wheel drive cars, I had gotten used to off throttle oversteer and other terrifying attributes of a properly fun front wheel drive setup. This, however, wasn't anything like that. After that corner I have no doubt in my mind that I could flip this car with a simple Scandinavian flick. Have you ever seen the Top Gear episode where Richard tries to get sideways in his van and ends up on the roof faster you can blink? How about the one where Jeremy flips the Reliant Robin more times than Charlie from Two and a Half Men has been to the doctor for an STD test? Of course you have. Well, that's what the Abarth feels like mid corner. The car is FAR too narrow, and much too tall to be driven the way it wants to be driven. Its truly scary in a way that completely turned me off from the car. Excessive oversteer is fun and usually controllable, torque steer is fun and controllable, but flipping a car off its wheels is rarely fun, and never controllable.

So there you have it: under the cute and cuddly looks, the Fiat 500 Abarth roars like a tiger and it certainly goes like a tiger. The problem lies when you finally build up the confidence to let it out of its cage, because it will undoubtedly kill you.